The kinds of pet loss support out there, and who each one suits
More than half of grieving owners in the RSPCA's survey, 56.7%[1], couldn't find the support they needed. Here's what exists, what it usually costs, and how to pick.
- Free groups and helplines, as well as paid counseling
- Options for children, couples and whole families
- Help asking your employer for time off
Start with what you need
Match the support to the kind of hurting you're doing
Grief after a pet isn't one problem, so there isn't one fix. Someone who can't stop replaying the vet appointment needs something different from a parent whose six-year-old keeps asking where the dog went. Someone who feels fine at home but falls apart at their desk needs something different again.
Before you choose, ask yourself two quick questions. Do I want to talk, listen, or do something with my hands? And do I want strangers who've been through it, or one trained person? Your answers point fairly clearly to one of the options below. If you can't tell yet, the two-minute grief check-in helps you name what feels hardest this week.
Option 1
Pet loss support groups: talking with people who get it
A support group is a regular meeting of people who've lost an animal. Some are led by a trained facilitator, often a counselor or a vet social worker. Others are peer-run by volunteers who've been through it. They meet in libraries, vet hospitals, community rooms and, increasingly, on video calls.
At a first meeting you're usually not expected to speak. Many people just listen, then say their pet's name the second time. That alone can be a relief when you've spent weeks watching people's faces go blank. Most groups are free or ask for a small donation. Our guide to finding pet loss support groups lists what to look for in a well-run one, and group versus one-to-one support helps if you're torn.
Option 2
Grief counselors who understand animal loss
Individual counseling is private, one-to-one and paced around you. It suits guilt that won't let up, grief that's getting heavier after months instead of lighter, and losses that bring up older ones, like a pet who was the last link to a parent who died. Our article on why a pet's death can hurt more than a person's looks at how one loss can reopen another.
Specialists are rarer than you'd hope. One 2021 count found only about 80[2] qualified, accredited pet bereavement counseling therapists in private practice across the whole of the UK. In practice, a licensed therapist with bereavement training who takes animal loss seriously is often just as good. In the US, look for a licensed counselor, clinical social worker or psychologist; ask whether they've worked with pet loss before your first session.
- Have you supported clients after the death of a pet?
- Do you offer video sessions, and what's the fee per session?
- Do you take my insurance, or offer a sliding scale?
- How many sessions do people usually have for bereavement?
Fees vary by country, city and qualification; one Calgary psychology practice, for example, charges CA$220 for a 60-minute pet-loss session[3]. By our calculation, one private hour like that costs roughly the same as a basic private cremation, while at least four university and charity lines across the US, UK and Australia/NZ cost nothing to call[4]. Ask for the cost per session up front. Some workplace employee assistance programs pay for a handful of free sessions, and it's worth checking before you pay privately. For more, see our overview of professional pet loss counseling.
Option 3
Pet bereavement helplines for a single conversation
A helpline is for when you need to talk now, once, without booking anything. Trained volunteers answer, and they won't try to fix you. In the UK, the Blue Cross runs a free Pet Bereavement Support Service by phone, email and webchat. In the US, veterinary schools such as Tufts and Cornell run free pet loss support lines answered by trained volunteers and veterinary students; hours change, so check the current schedule before you call.
Option 4
Support for children and teenagers
For many children, a pet's death is their first experience of death at all. Parents feel the weight of that: 93.4%[5] of parents in the RSPCA survey wanted better guidance on helping their children through it. Plain words help more than gentle stories. “He died, his body stopped working, and he can't come back” is kinder in the long run than “he went to sleep”, which can make bedtime frightening.
Most children need their own small role: drawing a card, choosing a spot for the photo, placing a toy in the garden. Teenagers may grieve quietly and in private, and may prefer an online space. School counselors can help if a child is struggling at school. Our article on helping children after pet loss goes through what to say at different ages.
What words did you use to tell a child the pet had died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Option 5
Memorial rituals and remembrance workshops
Not everyone wants to talk. For some people, grief moves when their hands are busy: pressing flowers, writing a letter, planting a shrub, making a photo book. Some pet crematories, animal charities and community centers run remembrance evenings or memory-making workshops, often around the winter holidays.
You can also make your own. The farewell planner helps you choose who to invite, where to gather and which small rituals to include, then gives you a checklist you can print.
Free tool
Farewell & memorial service planner
Build a simple goodbye: who, where, readings, rituals and a checklist.
Option 6
Pet bereavement leave and a letter to your manager
Work is where grief often ambushes people. In the RSPCA survey, 92%[6] of employed respondents said pet loss affected them at work, yet 28.4%[7] couldn't take any time off. Formal policies are uncommon: only 11%[8] of employers offer paid pet loss leave, according to AbsenceSoft.
If there's no policy, a short, calm request often works. Say what happened in one sentence, ask for one or two specific days (or a day working from home), and offer to cover urgent tasks. You don't need to justify the relationship. In the UK, the conciliation service Acas notes in its bereavement leave guidance that an employer can still choose to give time off where no policy exists. How other readers' employers reacted is tracked on our live poll results page. Our guide on asking your boss for time off after a pet dies has sample wording, or we can email you a simple template if you ask through the form.
How did your workplace respond when your pet died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Side by side
How the main support options compare
| Support | Typical cost | Suits you if | How to start |
|---|---|---|---|
| Support group | Free or a small donation | You feel alone and want to hear from others | Ask your vet or search for groups near you |
| Counselor or therapist | Paid per session; ask about insurance or sliding scale | Guilt, heavy grief after months, or older losses resurfacing | Ask about pet loss experience before booking |
| Pet loss helpline | Usually free | You need one conversation, soon | Check opening hours first |
| Children's support | Mostly free resources; child therapists charge fees | A child is anxious, withdrawn or asking hard questions | Start at home, involve school if needed |
| Rituals and workshops | Free to modest | You'd rather do than talk | Plan a small ritual at home |
| Bereavement leave request | Free | Work is where it's hitting hardest | Ask your manager for specific days |
Many people combine two: a group for company and a ritual for closure, or a few counseling sessions plus a day off work. If you're not sure where to begin, tell us what's going on and we'll suggest a starting point, or look at support near you.
Reader polls
What would you choose?
Vote anonymously and see how other readers answered. The results are live counts from people who visit this site, so they show real opinions, not a scientific sample.
How did your workplace respond when your pet died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
What helped you most in the first weeks?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Did you take time off work after your pet died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Questions people ask
What's the difference between a pet loss counselor and a regular therapist?
A pet loss counselor has specific training or long experience with animal bereavement. A general therapist with bereavement training can be just as helpful if they take pet loss seriously. The key is to ask before booking whether they've supported people after a pet's death, and how they approach it. You should never feel you have to defend why you're grieving.
Are online pet loss support groups as helpful as in-person ones?
For many people, yes. Online groups are easier to join when you're exhausted, live rurally or don't want to cry in public. In-person groups can feel warmer and more grounding. Try one meeting of whichever feels less daunting. If it doesn't suit you, that's information, not failure, and a different group may feel completely different.
Does health insurance cover pet grief counseling?
Sometimes. Insurance usually covers therapy for grief-related symptoms like depression or anxiety, not the pet loss itself, and it depends on your plan and the therapist being in network. Ask the therapist how they bill. A workplace employee assistance program is also worth checking, as many offer a few free, confidential sessions.
How do I ask my boss for time off after my pet died?
Keep it short and specific. Tell your manager your pet has died, that you're finding it hard to focus, and ask for a particular day or two off or to work from home. Offer to hand over anything urgent. Most managers respond better to a clear request than a long explanation. If your company has a leave policy, cite it.
Should my child see a counselor after our pet died?
Most children grieve well with honest words, a small role in saying goodbye and adults who let them ask questions. Consider extra help if, after several weeks, a child has lasting trouble sleeping, refuses school, becomes very fearful of other people dying, or seems stuck. A school counselor or family doctor is a good first step.
Keep reading
Pet loss grief support resources
Reading, listening, groups and clinical care in one place.
Find support near you
How pet loss support differs by country, state and city.
Helping children through pet loss
What to say, and what to avoid, at different ages.
Ask us for options
Tell us what would help and we'll reply by email.
Sources and our estimates
- [1] 56.7% of bereaved pet owners in the RSPCA survey could not find the support they needed. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [2] About 80 qualified, accredited pet bereavement counselling therapists were in private practice in the UK (Sadgrove, 2021, cited in a 2024 peer-reviewed study). Coping with Animal Companion Loss: A Thematic Analysis of Pet Bereavement Counselling (PMC11017691), 2021.
- [3] A Calgary psychology practice charges CA$220 per 60-minute pet-loss counselling session, which Alberta Health Care does not cover. Trio Psychology – Pet Loss Counselling (Calgary), 2026.
- [4] A private pet-loss counselling hour (CA$220 in Calgary) costs about as much as a basic private cremation, while at least four university and charity lines in the US, UK and Australia/NZ are free to call. Our estimate: Count of free-to-call lines: Tufts, Cornell, Blue Cross, Pets and People (free call). How we calculate.
- [5] 93.4% of parents in the RSPCA survey wanted better guidance on helping children through pet loss. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [6] 92% of employed respondents said pet loss affected them at work. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [7] 28.4% of RSPCA survey respondents could not take time off work after their pet died. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [8] Only 11% of employers offer paid pet loss leave, according to an AbsenceSoft survey. AbsenceSoft — Understanding Pet Bereavement Leave and Its Importance to Today's Workforce, 2025.
Tell us which support you're looking for
Tell us what you need and where you are. We'll reply by email with clear options and prices so you can decide in your own time.