Plan a small, meaningful goodbye for your pet
Grief without a ritual can feel like it has nowhere to go, especially when 57.1%[1] of bereaved owners feel they have to hide it. This planner helps you make a simple farewell in a few minutes.
- Choose people, place, rituals and music
- Printable checklist when you're done
- Works for a first goodbye or an anniversary
Farewell & memorial service planner
A goodbye doesn't need to be big to mean a lot. Choose what feels right and we'll turn it into a simple checklist you can print or copy.
Your plan
A farewell for our pet
At home
Next step: Arrange cremation or a service near you →
Why a farewell helps
Why a simple ritual can ease grief
When a person dies, there's a funeral: a time, a place, and permission to cry in front of others. When a pet dies, there's usually nothing. The loss just sits in the house. A small farewell gives the grief an edge and a date, and lets the people who loved your animal share it rather than each carrying it alone. That matters when only 13.4%[2] of bereaved owners in the RSPCA's pet bereavement survey felt fully understood by others.
It doesn't need to be formal or long. Ten minutes in the yard with a candle and a few words counts. So does a walk on the old route with a friend who knew your dog. What matters is that it's deliberate and that it feels like you. The ASPCA's end-of-life care advice makes the same point, suggesting you remember your pet together with the people who loved them. The wish to mark a life is widespread: by our estimate, around 765,000 US families a year[3] are open to a personalized keepsake, based on US pet cremation numbers and the share of owners interested in personalized memorials. A ritual is the free version of that same impulse.
Using the planner
How the farewell planner works, step by step
- Who. Close family, children, friends and neighbors who knew your pet, other pets, your vet or care team, or a celebrant or faith leader. Leave them all unticked and the plan simply reads "just us". The planner adds a job for each, like giving children a small role.
- Where. At home, in the garden, a favorite walk or place (a beach or park fits here), a pet cemetery, the crematorium, or online if people are far apart.
- Rituals. Pick from lighting a candle, a reading or poem, planting something, writing a letter to your pet, a photo display, sharing a memory each, or scattering or burying ashes if you have them.
- Music. Add a song or two, or choose silence.
- Checklist. The planner turns your choices into a short list of what to prepare, with a box to tick beside each job, which you can print or copy.
Everything updates as you choose, so you can try different combinations and see what feels right. Nothing is sent anywhere; the plan lives on your screen until you print or copy it.
A worked example
Example: a family goodbye for an old Labrador
A family of four ticks close family and children, chooses the garden, and types "Saturday morning" in the When box; the grandparents will join by video. The rituals are a candle, each person sharing one funny memory, and the children planting a rosemary bush by the gate the dog used to guard, with the photo display unticked. In the music box they type the song from the car on beach trips.
The checklist that comes out is short: tell close family the time, explain things to the children and give them a small role, plan a sheltered backup spot, get a candle and choose who lights it, buy the plant, a spade and compost, ask everyone for one memory, prepare the song, decide who opens and closes, and leave time afterwards. The family adds a few notes of their own: test the video link the night before, find a jar candle that won't blow out, and keep the whole thing under half an hour, because young children lose focus and shorter is easier to hold together.
What words did you use to tell a child the pet had died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Special situations
Farewells with children, and for anniversaries
Children cope better with a clear role than with watching adults cry. Let them light the candle, choose the photo or place a toy. Parents clearly want help here: 93.4%[4] in the RSPCA survey asked for better guidance on children and pet loss. Our article on supporting children after pet loss covers what to say beforehand.
The planner works just as well a year later. Many people mark the first anniversary with a smaller version of the original farewell, or hold the ceremony they couldn't face at the time. If you're grieving before your pet has died, which 75.4%[5] of RSPCA respondents did, you might even plan a gentle last good day together; see our piece on anticipatory grief.
How do you mark the day your pet died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
What it doesn't do
What the planner can't do for you
The planner doesn't book anything, arrange a celebrant or handle cremation or burial. It won't check local rules about scattering ashes in parks, rivers or beaches, which vary by place, so ask your local council or park authority first. And it can't make the day painless. It just takes a few decisions off your plate.
If you're weighing up aftercare before planning the goodbye, the aftercare options comparison sets out cremation, burial and water cremation side by side.
Free tool
Aftercare options compared
Compare private, communal and water cremation with burial on cost, timing and what comes home.
After the farewell
What to do after the goodbye
People often feel a mix of relief and emptiness afterwards. That's normal. Keep the next day light if you can, and let someone know how it went. If the farewell opened up grief rather than settling it, a pet loss support group or the private grief check-in can help you work out what you need next.
Want more ritual ideas, including ones that work when you can't gather in person? See choosing a personal ritual after pet loss or ask us for ideas. If you'd like company in your grief as well as a ritual, our overview of pet loss support and support near you are good next stops.
Reader polls
What would you choose?
Vote anonymously and see how other readers answered. The results are live counts from people who visit this site, so they show real opinions, not a scientific sample.
How do you mark the day your pet died?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
What helped you most in the first weeks?
Tap an answer to vote and see how others answered. Anonymous.
Questions people ask
Is it strange to hold a funeral or memorial for a pet?
Not at all. More and more families mark a pet's death with a small ceremony, from a candle at home to a gathering in the garden. A farewell simply acknowledges that someone important has gone. It can help children understand what's happened and give adults a moment to grieve openly, which many people otherwise don't get.
What can I read at a pet's farewell?
Anything that feels true. Some people choose a short poem, others read a letter they've written to their pet, and many prefer to share memories instead. A few sentences about what made your pet who they were, a funny habit or a favorite place, often mean more than any formal reading.
Do I need my pet's ashes or body for a farewell?
No. Many farewells happen before ashes come back, after a communal cremation where no ashes are returned, or long after burial. A photo, collar, favorite toy or a newly planted shrub can be the focus instead. What matters is marking the loss, not having remains present.
How soon after my pet dies should I hold a farewell?
Whenever it feels right. Some families hold one within days, others wait until the ashes return, and some choose a meaningful date like a birthday. There's no deadline. If you're too raw now, the planner will still work in a month, or on the first anniversary.
Sources and our estimates
- [1] 57.1% felt they had to hide their grief after a pet died, and 57.8% perceive stigma around pet loss. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [2] Only 13.4% of bereaved pet owners felt fully understood by others. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [3] Around 765,000 U.S. families a year are likely open to a personalized pet keepsake. Our estimate: 1.5M pet cremations x 51% interest in personalized memorials. How we calculate.
- [4] 93.4% of parents in the RSPCA survey wanted better guidance on helping children through pet loss. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
- [5] 75.4% of RSPCA pet-loss survey respondents experienced anticipatory grief before their pet died. RSPCA — Pet Loss Survey Results, 2026.
Want help shaping a farewell?
Tell us what you need and where you are. We'll reply by email with clear options and prices so you can decide in your own time.